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Dear Friends,
Greetings:
I truly hoped to make a web entry while I was travelling in India but it just wasn't to be...so much happening all the time, so much going on. This trip, from the moment I left New York, has been a spiritual gift in all sorts of ways. I was able to spend a lot of time with the Missionaries of Charity and catch up with many old friends.
Naturally, one of the first things I did was to visit Mother Teresa's tomb which is actually in the Mother House beneath the chapel, in a room that used to serve as the novice's refectory. I didn't feel sad or emotional in any way--just delighted to have finally made it to pray at Mother's resting place and to be back at the Mother House in a place that holds so many fond memories and--a place I love.
A lot of changes at the Mother House . . . for one thing the huge numbers of pilgrims flowing in and out all day long. When I first went to Calcutta in 1981 there were about 8-12 volunteers at morning mass, now there are at least a hundred. And after mass they cram into what used to be a storeroom to have breakfast-- tea, a banana and bread. That hasn’t changed.
From Kolkata I took the same trip to Darjeerling that Mother had taken in l946 when she received her "call within a call". The trip when she heard Jesus asking her to leave the comfort of her Loreto convent to go onto the streets to serve Him in his ‘distressing disguise of the poorest of the poor.’
I wanted to make this trip not just to honor Mother and her work but also because I wanted to make some kind of external demonstration of my internal process. I have no idea how that should look or in what direction my life should go. Last year I turned sixty and if I'm extremely fortunate I might have another twenty years of life, so I want to really pay attention to every day and to more deeply surrender my life to the God. I think I wanted this journey to demonstrate my willingness to the Universe by following Mother's example. And it was extraordinary--a lifetime of experiences packed into every 24hours.
First, I travelled to Darjeerling and stayed with the Missionaries of Charity. I visited the Loreto convent and chapel where Mother had stayed and where she had prayed.
It was quite heart-wrenching, fantastic, and more thought-provoking than I expected. One morning we transported some new babies from one of the MC centers to their orphanage about three hours away. I witnessed a young mother in deepest distress at parting with her child. She was a fourteen years old rape victim. Heartbreaking. The sisters of course see this daily but from years and years of experience and with abundant compassion they know what is best all round; but still for me it was dreadful. I was handed the tiny bundle and carried it on my lap in the front seat of a jeep, no seatbelt, as we hurtled around steep mountain curves scattering every creature or human in our path!
Throughout India I visited so many MC centers and saw again the hordes of suffering humanity--children, TB patients, cripples, mentally ill, deformed, blind, mute--the list goes on—yet these ‘sufferers’ had radiant faces; they were so happy and loving. The Missionaries of Charity do this amazing work! Their way of life is not for me, but there is no denying the joy that exudes from their centers. I was with people who have absolutely nothing, nothing, nothing--and they were full of good will when greeting me. I was surrounded by enlightened masters everywhere I went.
I had hoped for a spiritually enriching journey yet it turned out to be more spiritually "juicy" than even I imagined. Of course there’s a danger to this; one should not become trapped in the "experiences" because even when life seems dry it doesn't mean that nothing is happening. One of the greatest spiritual principles I have learned is never to judge my spiritual process.
However, at the end of the five-week trip I had a wonderful experience; I travelled to the Shantivanam ashram outside Thannirpalli in the south of India. Shantivanam is where Bede Griffith lived. (I urge you to investigate Bede Griffith on the internet). I had always wanted to meet Fr. Bede but even though I travelled to India many times, I never got to his ashram before he died in 1993. A great regret. It's hard to describe what I felt or experienced at Shantivanam, all I know is that my awareness shifted and I wanted to be there more than anywhere else in the world. I had the urge to just drop out of my life completely and stay there. Of course it would have been terribly irresponsible to just let others take care of all my business and "stuff." With sad reluctance I left. I do hope it's in the mind of God that I return.
Now, I'm back in New York preparing for a three-week retreat in Massachusetts. I'm sure much of what I observed and experienced will come up for review.
Thank you all for your prayers and for your support.
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With Love,
Lorna |
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4/6/2006
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Lorna Kelly
"Write that book for the Glory of God
and the Good of people"
- Mother Teresa
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