Oct 13, 2011, MID-OCTOBER

Massively sad about Steve Jobs - what an incredible individual. I'm beginning to see tributes to him on top of taxi-cabs. Just shows his picture and his dates against a illuminated white ground. It's quite dignified. My retreat in Massachusetts had to be cut short because I was experiencing such tightening pains in my chest and was having difficulty breathing. I had all the classic symptoms of having a heart attack. Naturally, I was very disappointed but I simply couldn't have continued, it was too difficult.

It just so happened that on the day I left, one of the members of staff was driving down to New York so instead of having to fiddle around with public transport, I was transported right to my doorstop.

That same evening I must have got up a dozen time to go to the toilet and literally it felt like Niagara flowed out of me. All that fluid was the cause of my pain and breathlessness. The next morning I felt perfectly fine! Although the fluid build-up is something that's a by-product of my heart problem at least I can now do something about it before it becomes so painful and critical.

This past weekend I traveled to Jacksonville, Florida to lead a retreat. It was really a terrific experience and everyone seemed to have a good weekend. I've been invited to lead a similar retreat in England next May which is wonderful for me since I want to be in England for the Diamond Jubilee!

Everyone keeps telling me how great I look, I'm sure I look good because I've never had so much rest - I find I need to sleep a lot, I guess I'm still in recovery! Finally going out to the Hamptons this weekend. It's now the middle of October and it's the first time I will have been out there in months - I was hoping to go after my surgery but then there was the small matter of Hurricane Irene and then one thing after another. But it will be great to be there and to walk on the beach. .